By Floyd Godfrey, LPC, CSAT candidate.
Although some guys claim to use sex or pornography as a leisure pastime, others report that they are hopelessly addicted to it. When this holds true, their spouse will experience emotional trauma. Women are left with doubts associated to their self-confidence as well as regarding the relationship. Identifying whether your spouse is addicted to sex is an essential concern.
Normally your husband is the one that will know for himself whether or not he is addicted, but there are addiction signs you could look for. The following is very common:
1. Does he make efforts to quit, also promises, yet keeps returning to pornography or sex?
2. Does he keep using pornography or sex when it contradicts his ethical or religious convictions?
3. Does he make attempts to hide the behaviors, or does he lie to others regarding the behaviors?
4. Does he frequently appear engrossed or disengaged when he is not engaged sexually?
5. Has your spouse ever before been caught using pornography or engaging sexual activity at improper times or places-- like at the office?
6. Has he ever missed vital activities as an outcome of pornography usage (e.g., spiritual tasks, family members outings, unique occasions, visits)?
7. Have you observed that he typically appears a lot more disconnected with you or with good friends?
If your husband has a dependency to pornography or sexual behavior, you'll see that emotional changes have taken place over time. These changes progressively increase. However, there is hope. He can free himself of this addiction and find renewed freedom in his life and in your relationship.
It's not a simple process and takes time. In addition, your own healing process as a woman will take time. It will require patience, education, and lots of hard work. Most couples in recovery will also seek out professional counseling as a part of this process.
Call Family Strategies Counseling Center for a complimentary 15-minute appointment with one of our therapists trained in sexual dependency in Mesa AZ (480) 668-8301.